Willpower, seduction and wit

I believe it wise upfront in this entry to emphasize that I am only speaking for my own experiences up to this point.


I think the dividing line between truly submissive people and those who like to roleplay (physically) weak or easily intimidated characters is their attitude toward willpower.

A recent conversation made me think about this. Roleplay games with this particular friend have a wide range of outcomes, but she herself tends to play characters who are fairly easily captured and imperiled, so much so that one might come to the erroneous conclusion that she is a classic "submissive" personality. She does not think of herself that way, and I don't think she is either.

What struck me recently was her characterization of her pleading with me to let her go as a battle of wills with me, the villain. And, full disclosure, she has moved even a hardened chestnut of a fiendish cad like me to let her go in an RP or two.

Now, what I found fascinating was her choice of words for how she got me to release her: not persuasion, not seduction, but a battle of wills. And I thought: you know, she's absolutely right!

I think this aspect unifies pretty much every woman I RP with (admittedly a very small group). None of them are submissive (and this is not at all a knock on you if you consider yourself one -- I am merely relating my experience, not placing a judgment of any kind). All of them are engaged in some sort of contest, in very varied ways, with very different means, but all of them utterly, utterly feminine (sorry, having a Goethe moment here), whether demure or fiery, fearful or fighting.

Even in the two exceptions to a battle of wills that I can think of, there is still a fundamental power sharing: One such exception is someone with fantasies of being sold into white slavery and humiliated en route. I don't normally do that kind of RP but she has charmed me with her exuberant sense of humour and reassured me with her even-headedness to indulge her. Even in her case she resists her abductor and is defiant. And I crack up every time with her spontaneous wit (before I gag her) as gloating villain and captured damsel trade insults. Even in the case of a girl who jokingly will wait by the railroad tracks waiting to be pounced on, her sarcastic wit and offbeat but utterly original plot ideas drive at least 50% of the RP action (as well as keep me both riveted and amused.)

And I am sure that such willpower, however it is expressed (and it can take very sly forms), is what keeps me keen, whether the heroine is able or incapable of escaping. The heroine has to be able to "win" -- however defined. Not that she'll have an easy time of it. Odd that the power struggle really begins after the heroine is captured and placed in a trap, not before.