No, not that kind. I am talking about bad music. Really bad music.
I am in the mood for a confessional, of sorts and within reason. A close friend asked me recently for a deep dark secret wish, and it turned out our minds thought a lot alike. You really don’t want to hear that one. But I had already shared a really embarrassing fact earlier in the conversation, and that was one of my guilty musical pleasures – a song I know I shouldn’t like, but do anyway.
I’ve made a list. Go ahead, laugh. Some of these get me in a mood for peril, some don’t.
“Miracles” – Jefferson Starship, 1976. Oh lord, where to start? The dippy little 1970’s stardust keyboards? The strangulated sax arpeggios? How about the most gruesome sound ever recorded: Grace Slick trying to sound sexy in the b-vox? I let this out of the Ghostbusters containment field where it had been sequestered these 33 years. And it is even trippier-dippier than I remember. I love it, but… any time anyone tells you the 70s didn’t suck, just say Marty Balin for the win. I was there. I know.
“Misunderstanding” – Genesis, 1980. Phil Collins. Don’t need to say much else to damn this 3 minute ode to exactly one (inadequate) musical idea and the perfidy of Woman. But it was a great tune to get drunk underage to. Plus, it – and its utter vacuousness – perfectly summarizes my early teen understanding of relationships. The guy who wrote this deserves to have been dumped – as did the skinny, dorky kid who thought this said it all.
“Brandy” – Looking Glass, 1972. A retelling of the Odyssey from Penelope’s point of view? Er, no. The chee-zee 70s soft rock vibe just makes it all go down smooth. Like motor oil. This song reminds me of a close friend, one who loves peril, so it gets me in the mood for highly idiosyncratic reasons.
“C’est la vie” – B*witched, 1996. Just in case we thought the sucking stopped in the 70s, here comes along this bit of Eurovision Oirish whimsy to brighten your day and destroy your future.
“Lido Shuffle” – Boz Scaggs, 1976. Anyone who refers to Chicago as “Chi-town” has never been there.
“Jungle Love” – Steve Miller, 1976. The second of a brace of guilty pleasures from two guys who went to the same prep school in Texas. For all the goofy guitar work on this, Steve-o sure put in some dark lyrics: “We all reach a scarlet conclusion/But we live our life in a dream…”
“New in Town” – Little Boots, 2009. Despite how it looks, my musical taste is not locked in the Carter Administration. Most of the contemporary music I get I actually think is good (Grizzly Bear, Phoenix, JJ, Yeasayer…) but this is a great, trashy song. You might know the origin of the name “Little Boots” better in the original Latin: Caligula.
“Let’s Go” – Wang Chung, 1984. Now, those old enough to fear the past probably recall the ultimate 80s-sucks song “Everbody Have Fun Tonight.” Believe it or not, Jack and Nick actually wrote that one as a very sweet, quiet song, which the label weasels turned into the icon of crap it is to this day. And “Dance Hall Days” is a clever quickstep. But you have to love the utter ridiculousness of this song. Well, you don’t, I guess. But I do.
I could go on, but I have incriminated myself enough for one day....
Woah, there Tiger. There's no such thing as a Guilty Pleasure in music, no matter what the Rockists say. But if there is, then there is no way that Little Boots should be on the list.
ReplyDeleteIn a world of American Idols and X-Factorists, we need young lasses like this who recognise the honest Pop song as a thing of wonder, not as a tool to take over the world with their narcissistic physog.
And can you really feel guilty about enjoying anyone who sets up camera in their own gaff to film themselves and their mates plink-plonking classic pop on their piano for the world to see:
http://www.youtube.com/littlebootsvideos
No. I didn't think so. And she's fit.
PS - nice blog. keep it coming.